Celebrating Relationships with a New Understanding

India is a country with diverse culture and festivals. Festivals were wisely devised with the purpose of fostering love, joy, and harmony in relationships and as a reminder of the ultimate purpose of human life.

Be it Lodhi celebrated up north, or Sankranti and the Kite festival in the west, Pongal down south, or Bihu in the east, these days offer an opportunity to look at your relationships afresh and bring harmony. Mere rituals cannot serve this primary purpose. Let us take a pause and use this opportunity to understand how we can truly bring lasting love and happiness in our relationships.

Every relationship is founded on the feelings that we bear towards the other person—both positive and negative. Our past experiences, in turn, have a bearing on these feelings. The experiences we gain over a period of time create a fixed mindset or perception about others. But human behavior can change with time; hence, predefining someone’s behavior is inappropriate. But we tend to be so biased about our opinions that we fail to see the other side.

The feelings (positive or negative) that we harbour have a great impact on our relations. This is because our feelings travel faster than our words and actions. For example, you might have experienced that you plan to meet your colleague for some work, but he refuses to help you. Your prior experience with him was not pleasant. This time, when you plan to meet him, your past experience brings back those memories making you feel negative. Now, these feelings have already reached him even before you both actually meet. And when you actually meet, he may appear to be rude and refuse to help. This further strengthens your negative belief about your colleague.

So how do we change this? A small change in the thoughts you pass on can create miraculous results. Whenever you plan to meet someone, keep aside your past experiences and consciously start sending blessings and positive thoughts for them before you physically meet them. Repeat positive thoughts by focusing on the others’ virtues, such as, “He is a good person. He is soft-spoken and very helpful. He too is a part of God’s creation and is pure and kind-hearted,” and so on. Be genuine in your attempt and meet them with an open mind. With this small change, you will experience that they too receive you positively. You may experience a happy and wondrous change in their behavior.

On the other hand, when you feel negative vibes coming towards you from the other person, maintain a neutral mindset. Continue to send positive thoughts and feelings to them. You cannot control what others think about you, but you can surely choose your thoughts wisely and continue to think well about others. It is a law of nature—Whatever you give, comes back to you. Positive vibes bring back positivity in life.

So let’s resolve to celebrate the first festival of the this year with acceptance and understanding. Let us bless the people in our lives and witness the wonderful blossoming of relationships in the garden of our life all through this year.

~ Based on the Teachings of Sirshree